IN LOVE AND WAR

It's the morning again, and the same view from the same window … nothing changed but seasons of the sun … the same old chair, the same old bed, the same broken walls and the same old house … the night is getting darker, the sun became bored but I was waiting for you …

Every night I was crossing the seas and I found you, fighting so brave behind the red lines … I get close to you, watching you saving so many souls … I ran to you and you looked surprised asking me about how I get here, so I put my hand on your mouth and gave you au fond kiss and my soul with it as a keeper angel … you smiled to me with your pure eyes which is like the calm sea and telling me "there's no good bye, only love" and sweep my tears away with your smile still shining on your face then, it's all slowly vanishing with the first light of the morning …

There was so much feeling inside, so much papers and feathers on the disk … the words in my head was in mess … how many times I set to write few words and put my feelings on the paper but it just keep running away … I've always thinking about my letters to you and if it has ever reached to you cause I'm saving it all on the wall beside the frame where I saved the first wild rose you gave to me …

The last flowers you put in the vase were beside our bed still, waiting for you to change it … the small heart that you draw on my hand was always keeping your warm touch … the memories of our last night were flying around and holding on in my mind … the sparkle in my eyes was fading but the hope in my heart was making it beat … It's been lots of days and very long to just pass by … you left me in no where, no time … "will you send me an angel?"

Sometimes, I was climbing the mountain just to call your name so loudly, to scream with all my power, get all my feelings out, falling apart on my knees and cry…

I look forward to heaven, I look forward to you … I was missing spending a warm night between your arms … day after day with sadness inside, day after day I did get weaker that I felt that my reflection in the mirror is fading away and is hardly there …

In someday, I stand on the top of the same mountain holding my hands to the sky and praying, I felt so much pain penetrate all my body as it's running with my blood … I screamed painfully and I didn’t know why did your name was the only word I was saying in this very moment … but suddenly, the pain was disappearing and I became like a peaceful river, I left my immortal body and entirely mixed with the tiny Atoms of the air, feeling the sweet cold, covered by the most pure light ever, flying over the white hells to the empty path of mine and all I was thinking of was you …

Then, I come to you my love crossing places and times … to the gray sky and the bloody lands … I saw the spirits lost, searching for their way to heaven while fear is breathing out the smoky air…I come to take you "love" to a place where we can catch the time and breath in happiness …

I found you in your lake of blood trying to stand up again, so I landed beside you letting my tears washing your pain … I held you close to my chest and I toke the light from the angels to full your heart, so I found your earthy clothe disappearing and the same pure light was covering you, your eyes were opening again and you toke my hand in yours and left this harmed body …

Finally together, we spend our last night on the earth in our wooden home and we went to heaven carrying all of our loving memories with us.


By Nour Badr
3-12-2008
Last edit 14/1/2009
Wednesday