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Saturday, January 24, 2009

That's what you think ..

Special , Unique , Different … That is what you think about yourself , no one is like you , you deserve the best , so no body will be perfect for you , you are the only one who deserves you … You feel that people can’t understand you , even the closest to you , and you may feel good about this but you u can’t keep the loneliness away from you …

When you want to care about someone and he won’t give it a chance ; when you lose your trust in everything ; when there’s no much hope … Your heart beats so strong , you can’t breath , you look around and every one is busy by his own things , you scream , but the voice is within … The night falls , you’re laying on the bed , turning “us against the world” song on , and this power invades you , some memories comes into your mind make you smile … Some pictures give you inspiration , some people make you realize what you’re living for and stories of them make you believe again , and sometime , just staring is all you need …

You think so much about love , about the person you’ll fall with , will he give you what you dream of , you see that movie with all this romantic moments and it’s all coming again ; I want to live like this , then , you find yourself in fantasy land , but what if the wrong one loved you right !? …



Tuesday, April, 15th
Nour Badr

Friday, January 23, 2009

Live .. Love .. Sing .. Dance




Wednesday, January 14, 2009

IN LOVE AND WAR



It's the morning again, and the same view from the same window … nothing changed but seasons of the sun … the same old chair, the same old bed, the same broken walls and the same old house … the night is getting darker, the sun became bored but I was waiting for you …

Every night I was crossing the seas and I found you, fighting so brave behind the red lines … I get close to you, watching you saving so many souls … I ran to you and you looked surprised asking me about how I get here, so I put my hand on your mouth and gave you au fond kiss and my soul with it as a keeper angel … you smiled to me with your pure eyes which is like the calm sea and telling me "there's no good bye, only love" and sweep my tears away with your smile still shining on your face then, it's all slowly vanishing with the first light of the morning …

There was so much feeling inside, so much papers and feathers on the disk … the words in my head was in mess … how many times I set to write few words and put my feelings on the paper but it just keep running away … I've always thinking about my letters to you and if it has ever reached to you cause I'm saving it all on the wall beside the frame where I saved the first wild rose you gave to me …

The last flowers you put in the vase were beside our bed still, waiting for you to change it … the small heart that you draw on my hand was always keeping your warm touch … the memories of our last night were flying around and holding on in my mind … the sparkle in my eyes was fading but the hope in my heart was making it beat … It's been lots of days and very long to just pass by … you left me in no where, no time … "will you send me an angel?"

Sometimes, I was climbing the mountain just to call your name so loudly, to scream with all my power, get all my feelings out, falling apart on my knees and cry…

I look forward to heaven, I look forward to you … I was missing spending a warm night between your arms … day after day with sadness inside, day after day I did get weaker that I felt that my reflection in the mirror is fading away and is hardly there …

In someday, I stand on the top of the same mountain holding my hands to the sky and praying, I felt so much pain penetrate all my body as it's running with my blood … I screamed painfully and I didn’t know why did your name was the only word I was saying in this very moment … but suddenly, the pain was disappearing and I became like a peaceful river, I left my immortal body and entirely mixed with the tiny Atoms of the air, feeling the sweet cold, covered by the most pure light ever, flying over the white hells to the empty path of mine and all I was thinking of was you …

Then, I come to you my love crossing places and times … to the gray sky and the bloody lands … I saw the spirits lost, searching for their way to heaven while fear is breathing out the smoky air…I come to take you "love" to a place where we can catch the time and breath in happiness …

I found you in your lake of blood trying to stand up again, so I landed beside you letting my tears washing your pain … I held you close to my chest and I toke the light from the angels to full your heart, so I found your earthy clothe disappearing and the same pure light was covering you, your eyes were opening again and you toke my hand in yours and left this harmed body …

Finally together, we spend our last night on the earth in our wooden home and we went to heaven carrying all of our loving memories with us.


By Nour Badr
3-12-2008
Last edit 14/1/2009
Wednesday

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Yesterday, Today, Forever

Yesterday when I was there, you came with big smile on your face and Hello words … hugs, kisses and warm meeting … I had things to tell with you, things that I would never say with anyone but you … freely I spoken and you were totally listening … I showed you my tears I never share, you felt my heart beats that no one knows about it, you read my thoughts, you catch my flying dreams with me and I live in yours, you know my story …

I look into your eyes, so I know how grateful I am … when I was so emotional and breathless, you held me to give me the far hope … your words are something else to me, and I am talking to you feeling so safe like I am throwing all my problems in a dark cave … We have fun, we get sad, we became philosophers in life or had this bad day that made us fall apart but in the end of the day we have us …

Sometimes I am so lost, can't sleep or even speak … Sometimes I became bad person, silent as the grave, not even smile … but, it's much beautiful how you can stand me, and you take my hand and hold it so tight and walk with me with no word, and I am still as I am but believe me I am so happy inside that you are here with me, beside me … you give me the space that I need and the inside relief that you understand me … and when you're closed, sad, have no intention to speak or don’t want my existence, I let you know that I am here for you then set you free cause I think that's what we do…

My friend, my family, my everything … it's enough for me to know that you exist somewhere, near or far, here or there, cause that made me feel relieve … may be, at some point, we lost that feeling about us but the small details, our memories and the moments we share, make it come back to us again, after we lost our faith, life ensure that it lives in us and we live in it … "I love you, I need you, I'm missing you in every step I walk, every word I say and every breath I take" it's just things I say to express my infinite feeling for you … every day I live is a miracle, but I love you as the miracle of my day …



* * This is to my angelical best friends, HAPPY NEW YEAR as forever friends * *

Nour Badr
Sat. 20/12/08
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